15. Hearts...Flowers? Give Me a "Chick Flick!"

It's Valentine's Day and the sun is shining!  What a wonderful gift that is!  We decided to celebrate yesterday. It's something we don't always do, celebrate Valentine's Day.  The commercials on television romanticize it too much.  The bar is set way too high, plus most of the things I don't need anyway.  I wear my favorite jewelery most every day, I don't wear pajamas and while I love flowers it seems more special when Bob comes in with the first rose or iris of the season announcing it is way to pretty not to enjoy inside.  He used to take quite a ribbing from co-workers when he was a surveyor and would find wild flowers to bring home, but he did it anyway.  He's quite the romantic, but not on demand.  It's when the mood strikes.  I guess we all do better when it's our idea.

One day I came home from work and saw our initials carved in a heart on the tree stump beside the driveway.  It wasn't Valentine's Day, just a regular old day of the week when I was clearly on his mind.  How can you top that on a day that marketers decide is important?  I don't think you can and those times have helped temper my old expectations.  So, now if I want to celebrate something I say "Know what I want to do for (whatever)?"  I want to...and then I tell him and he always says "Great!"  He's not stressed and I get what I want.  

That's not to say that he hasn't ever gotten me wonderful things, however, they are rarely on a special occasion.  I have a lovely silver engraved belt buckle and one day I came home from work particularly tired.  I was working with severely emotionally disturbed children at the time and it had been a very trying day.  Bob said, "Honey, I got you something."  I said, "Well, it better be good, I've had a s@#%&;* day."  Now I've felt small before, but when I opened the box and he had had his father's and his grandfather's diamonds set in the simplest and truly loveliest necklace...well, you can imagine how humbling the moment was!  I have since had my mother's diamond set below the others.  They are perfectly graded, one slightly larger than the other.  It is as if they were made for each other.  I wear them every day and rarely a day goes by that someone doesn't compliment me on them.  Everyone thinks that I have been a really good girl.  Sadly three wonderful people had to go to their Celestial Fandango for me to become the "Keeper of the Stones."

I'm learning to make lists through the year so that when our son or daughter ask what I want I have something to reference.  It seems when asked, my mind goes blank.  So, silly socks or a magazine subscription usually top the list.  I'm mad about silly socks.  Whether stripes or stars, puppies or hearts, they are always welcome for any occasion.  My sister has gotten me several for no reason at all, even better!  My favorite are the black ones with happy cowgirls going down the side.  She gave me some with cowboy boots, too.  Magazines always get read when they are a gift.  Rachael Ray tops my list right now and I have read Family Circle for forty years.

It really is true that it's the thought that counts.  Even if it is something that makes you wonder if the person really knows you.  I've never received anything that was so unbecoming  you couldn't wear it once.  Close calls, but I've worn it anyway.  If we lived in a larger house, I would have an Ugly Christmas Sweater party.  I guess they are all the rage.  Someone had a television segment on them last holiday season.  What a wonderful idea for all those ghastly creations that only grammar school teachers wear!  Come on, you know we have all been tempted!  Several entrepreneurial geniuses are making a nice extra income haunting second-hand stores gathering them up and then selling them on the internet!  Only in America!!  It's crazy but it's true! 

Speaking of crazy but true, in Japan, Valentine's Day is when only women are expected to buy fancy chocolates.  They are bought for all the men in their lives including bosses and co-workers. The average cost to them is about  two hundred and fifty dollars.  Men follow suit a month later on White Day.  We learn crazy things on CBS Sunday Morning!  It's one show we rarely miss!  Watch the video!

http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=6207442n

So, ladies be glad you don't live in Japan and if you are disappointed with what your Valentine got for you, next time about a week before the day greet your other with..."Know what I want to do for Valentine's Day?"  Then just tell him.  Unless he is one of those rare men who love to plan things, he will be soooooooo relieved and "You'll score exactly what you want!"  He will be stunned at how much money he will save and how happy you will be!

As a footnote: if you are lucky enough to have a husband who likes "Chick Flicks," and love Gary Marshal as we do, go see "Valentine's Day."  It is so sweet and good.  On the opposite end of the spectrum, "From Paris With Love," with John Travolta was "check your brain at the door," fabulous!  Gotta love him BALD!